12.14.12 (half-awake)

Half-awake;
It's far too early.
Bills are overdue,
But I'm thirsty.
My legs are stiff;
Not enough traveling.
You are gone,
But the world is still turning.
Close my eyes,
Slip into a dream,
It's warm outside
With a cool Breeze.
Back to life
And hot coffee.
Still, times tough,
But I guess that's OK.

12.11.12 (repetition at world's end)

Sad songs
And bad dreams
Fill the nights.
I've seen this before
Sometime long ago.
I almost wish
The world truly was
Coming to an end
If only to see things
As beautiful
As they truly are

12.8.12 (departures/arrivals)

January
Approaches
So I smile:
One departed
One arrived
And I am
No longer
Bound to three.

12.8.12 (bloom)

Flowers
Blooming
From my
Chest
Ripped from
The ground
You saw the
Best.
I offered,
You declined
And now I know
You'll never be mine.
So I'll leave a flower
Rested on your step
To remind of a nights
Shared by two friends
And as you leave
Through mountain peaks
I'll be in bed
Finally forgetting.

12.7.12 (later, perhaps)

I would have loved
To leave a flower
On your step
Every day
Of every month
You had gotten away.
I would have loved
The opportunity
To tell you the beauty
I see so clearly
In every smile.
I would have loved
To have had a single moment
Of your attention
If only to show you
The depth of it.
I see now
Thats not possible
So I will laugh harder,
Smile bigger,
Cry less,
And hope to see you,
Some distant day
In light anew.

12.6.12 (neutral)

Slipping back
Into neutral.
Bread tastes like bread
And wine, wine.
Now knowing
I stumbled
Onto a miracle
By accident
And
It only took me
A year to see.
I haven't been
Sleeping much
But that's nothing new;
If anything,
A sign:
Things are almost
But not quite
Normal again

12.5.12 (optim)

staring at the sun
until the colors
disappear.
and everything
looks
bleak,
but
hopeful.

12.4.12 (January flowers)

I feel myself
Growing.
Seeds
Sewn and reaped
Yielded
Only sorrow.
New seeds have
Been dropped
And as I
Smile
I feel this garden
Grow.

12.4.12 (due)

Free and easy;
Better times.
Being alone
Didn't matter as much
Before that January night.
You never desired that;
Lonesome feelings
Provoke action.
If you wanted me,
I would leap,
But it is her.
And I will try
To be true
Because it is she
And not you
That wants me.

12.3.12 (stale, negative)

hungover
and short
on rent.
digging through
possessions
to see what i can
sell off.
digging through
my phone book
to see which bridge
i have yet to burn.
the taste of
stale whiskey
and cocaine
on my tongue.
my fridge is empty,
my head is full,
perhaps too full.
i do not like
where i am headed
but i see nowhere else
left to go.

12.3.12 (lost)

More time
Counting out
Collecting moments
Forgotten.
Confused
And feeling a bit
Rotten,
The nights have been
Drug-ridden
And far too long.
Lost in this,
Muddle
I dig my hole deeper.
Soon
There will be
No more light
To guide me home.

12.1.12 (black)

It's December
And I'm still in love.
I don't remember
the past few nights
But maybe that's good
Because that's less time
I remember
Thinking of you