1.19.11

dear friend

where did you go

you left, you took a trip

to a place you shouldn't know

and now you're lost

caught up in a mess

but we could nevereverever

stop loving you, i promise

so come on home

come back to us

just be patient my friend

we'll surround you with love

you had me scared

we've all cried

because we got a glimpse of

the pain that you held inside

please come with me

i swear we'll smile

you're everything to me

best friends for a long while

so come on home

come on back to us

just be patient my friend

we will surround you with love

don't be discouraged

i know you try

we'll do this together

you and me in time

i just want to see

your laughing face

anything to quell

sad thoughts polluting my brain

just know i love you

know that we all do

our hearts may be fragile

but they all grow anew

just come on home

come on back to us

and no matter what

we will again have fun

1.14.11 (the request)

i open my eyes

the same eyes i've always had

i see things a little different now

i don't know if that's bad

through my nostrils i breathe in

i breathe in the air

it's the only thing that

we can all agree to share

and i don't know if i'm young

but i am glad

no one likes being down

cherish all the times we've had

and the water that falls

coming down from the sky

it mirrors the rain

that falls from my eyes

so don't make me feel sad

cause i don't want to cry

and i really do love you

and i will show you when i

kiss you on your neck

and i am very grateful

i am happy i met you

you make everything too good to ever be

mad

1.5.11 (2011 doesn't feel much different)

i'm not going to pretend

that i know what's going on

and don't think for a single moment

i've forgotten what's been done

i stare out into white light

white heat to shake this mood

but the passing clouds remind me

forever always comes too soon

so i roll my body back over

and i try to fall back asleep

i cover my head with my blanket

return to some hazy dream

i'm not sure if i'm awake

and i'm not sure if i am dead

i think i've been here before

within the mess inside my head

i wake up and try to make sense

of what is real and what is not

i give up, just feeling grateful

for having all that i have got

thanks friends, thanks family

thank you to the shining sun

thank you to everything in this world

thank you every one