1.5.11 (2011 doesn't feel much different)

i'm not going to pretend

that i know what's going on

and don't think for a single moment

i've forgotten what's been done

i stare out into white light

white heat to shake this mood

but the passing clouds remind me

forever always comes too soon

so i roll my body back over

and i try to fall back asleep

i cover my head with my blanket

return to some hazy dream

i'm not sure if i'm awake

and i'm not sure if i am dead

i think i've been here before

within the mess inside my head

i wake up and try to make sense

of what is real and what is not

i give up, just feeling grateful

for having all that i have got

thanks friends, thanks family

thank you to the shining sun

thank you to everything in this world

thank you every one