It used to feel like this grand physical
Expulsion of demons plaguing me
Or of feelings too great to bear alone
The past two years I fear I’ve lost that
Acuteness
That sense of feeling that allowed the
Feelings to permeate
And escape through my fingertips.
As if the nerves in my body have become
Irreparably damaged
And I cannot even feel that which
I would like to be rid of,
And the fear of wholesale cleansing
Means losing the feelings I cherish as well.
It’s an irrational fear, sure,
But the lack of feeling, the lack of present,
Those are real,
And I’m unsure I’ll ever regain that feeling
Completely.
